Men, For Example…

What caused the stigma of men cheating on their wives with other men?

But there is none when it comes to women cheating on their husbands with other women? Which do you think is more common? What is the equivalent for the female compared to the down low of men?

Public Comments

1. Many people believe if a man cheats with another man then he should have known he was gay or bi-sexual and should have been upfront with this to his wife. If he is gay he should not have even married her. When a woman cheats with another woman I guess it may be a little more acceptable because this is viewed as a man's fantasy. His woman with another woman. Either way you want to say it, cheating is still cheating.
2. Wives cheating on their husbands with other women seems like it would be more common. But, I could be wrong. Probability and all that jazz. That's a good question, tho. I've never really thought about it. Kudos!
3. There is a problem with any homosexual behavior. Think of terms used to describe homosexual behavior. queer: strange, odd, unusual original gay: bright, colorful, cheerful today's gay: nothing bright, nothing colorful, nothing cheerful about it.
4. Men screwing other men is more likely to transmit disease. They come home to infect their wives. This is a HUGE public health concern in Africa, where AIDS kills many people every year. Kids are orphaned, babies become infected at birth. Its a crisis: "New research has challenged the long-standing belief that HIV and AIDS in Africa primarily affect heterosexuals. A study published on the website of the British medical journal Lancet found that men who have sex with other men are up to 10 times more likely than their heterosexual counterparts to be infected with the virus — which suggests that the fight against AIDS on the continent may be undermined by widespread homophobia. Researchers from Oxford University, the Population Council of Ghana and the Kenya Medical Research Institute reviewed AIDS studies conducted over the past few years and concluded that male-male sex was a major blind spot in AIDS research and policy in Africa. Men having sex with other men is far more common in Africa than is socially acknowledged, owing to widespread hostility toward homosexuality, and the phenomenon there is underreported in research and largely ignored in public-health responses to the pandemic. The researchers compiled statistics from a small but growing number of studies conducted in various African countries in recent years that included estimates of HIV prevalence among men who have sex with other men. (See pictures from Africa's AIDS crisis.) Many of Africa's gay communities operate largely underground. Zimbabwean President Robert Mugabe set the tone of the public discourse on homosexuality throughout much of the continent back in 1995, when he remarked at the Harare Book Fair that he found it "repugnant" that "... homosexuals, who offend both against the law of nature and the morals of religious beliefs espoused by our society, should have any advocates in our midst and even elsewhere in the world." Male-male sex is a criminal offense in some 31 sub-Saharan African countries; it even draws the death penalty in a few — on the books, at least, if hardly ever in practice. In January 2009, gay-rights activists were shocked when a Senegalese judge sentenced nine gay members of an HIV/AIDS awareness group to eight-year jail terms for "indecent conduct and unnatural acts." The sentences were subsequently overturned, but the case highlights one reason it has been so difficult to reach gay men with AIDS-prevention messages: most of them don't want to be found. One consequence of the enforced invisibility of gays, the report concluded, is that many African men live double lives in which they are far likelier to engage in risky sexual behaviors with other men, raising the danger of further spreading the virus in their heterosexual relationships. "In countries that protect sexual minorities, those groups are able to access services and reduce their risks," the lead researcher, Adrian Smith, tells TIME. "But as long as behaviors remain criminalized and stigmatized, you're on the one hand asking a group to identify themselves and be integrated into a health system — but then the state still poses structural obstacles to prevent them doing that." In Uganda, whose government is considering a law to criminalize the distribution of literature with homosexual content, gays are often the targets of fire-and-brimstone sermons and public rallies. Ugandan activists say that if the law is passed, it would prevent them from educating people about safe sexual behaviors — another issue highlighted in the report. The report found that gay men are more likely than heterosexuals to engage in risky behaviors, perhaps because AIDS-prevention messages are aimed at heterosexuals. "There are many men in Africa who think that anal sex is safe, because they have never been told that it's not," says Smith. While activists in some countries say that attacks against gays are becoming increasingly widespread and vociferous, gays are also beginning to speak out with greater determination. Gay-rights activists in Botswana, for example, have been fighting a loud and public battle to decriminalize homosexuality — an offense now punishable by up to seven years in prison. Increasingly, activists are targeting anti-gay laws as an obstacle to combating HIV/AIDS, according to reports from MASK, a gay-and-lesbian-advocacy group based in South Africa. In most African countries, however, public opinion remains intolerant of homosexuality. Far more devastating than the laws, it is often the hostile attitudes of churches, families and communities that keep most gays in the closet, Smith says. "How do you access a population that doesn't want to be found?" he says. "That is the long-term question." It is a problem growingly recognized by international AIDS groups and even sometimes by national governments. Senegal may have been among the more intolerant African countries by measure of social and legal tolerance of homosexuality, but it is ironically also one of the few to offer a national HIV program that specifically addresses male-male sex." ************************ Two lesbians going at it... no such risk. Face it, some men will screw barnyard animals and knotholes in trees. Anything that will stay still long enough. Women are more discerning - the emotional element matters. That's much more rare.
5. Perhaps men would not be threatened by their wife becoming involved with another woman? I personally can't see the difference - as someone else said, cheating is cheating. But there does seem to have been a greater stigma associated with male homosexuality as apposed to female homosexuality. Likely because men are more uncomfortable with the former than the latter. If it is not already an equivalent for women, I can't think of what would be.
6. Perversion is not only being taught, but encouraged in the schools. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4rxHec9KpY
7. There's no stigma, the genders are condemned equally for cheating.
8. I had a huge argument with a gay friend about this - he's out, but he is very familiar with married men living on the "down low." I find this appalling, because an innocent wife is being lied to and possibly given a life-altering disease. He sees nothing wrong with it, because the privacy of the man must be protected regardless of the collateral damage. I see nothing right with it, because a life lived as a lie is no life at all. Gay women have a much lower incidence of disease, and besides, two women together are hot, especially if you can watch. (So says my ex.) Cheating is cheating and constitutes adultery no matter how you look at it.
9. Female homosexuality does not have the same stigma as male homosexuality because simply put, it doesn't gross people out nearly as much. It has to do with the female form being a thing of accepted beauty and male form being simply masculine. Femine things are more artistically beautiful than masculine things.
10. i hear of this a lot.i think they had to be in the closet and covered their self's to be with a woman so no one would know their true self.its a cover up i think,but then they eventually have to let lose and be happy ..the truth always comes out some how.
11. Sneaking around is no longer needed with websites like this one: http://www.AshleyMadison.com/A14863 Men on men action is evolving through online dogma and fantasy, for the most part. Who really know how many guys are really gay and have married a woman to have a "cover". They are openly propagating older women and younger men to cheat with each other through a web-based service. Not just a chat room. Not just an email-fest of dirty talk. We are talking about real people really physically cheating on each other thanks to this service.